I was having a good old chin wag with a Scottish bloke in a pub and he told me a story of his taxi ride from Paddington Station. He asked the driver to take him to his hotel. The ride shouldn’t have been more than about 10 minutes but it seemed to take an incredibly long time to get there. He asked the driver if he knew where he was going and the driver assured him that everything was fine.
Finally, they reached their destination and the driver asked for a small fortune for the long journey. Before my Scottish friend handed him the money he said, ‘Just out of curiousity, how many Selfridges have you got here in London?” The driver was confused and said, “Just the one.” My friend said, “So how come we passed by it 5 times. Here’s 5 quid and thanks for the ride.”
Foreigners always have to watch out for black cabs – they’ll take you right round the ‘ouses before you get to your destination.